1. cyrusk - July 15, 1999 - 5:35 PM PT
Everybody's had the experience of telling one of their favorite jokes only to receive a deadpan look in response. At least I know I have...more than once. This is the place to examine and share all the nuances of Fray humor and debate what's funny and what's not.
2. ChristinO - July 15, 1999 - 5:42 PM PT
Visual jokes don't go over well in the Fray.
3. ChristinO - July 15, 1999 - 5:43 PM PT
Well, except for our long lost DEmENTEd artist's.
4. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 6:06 PM PT
Yea...the Fray lost alot of humor when Dente was hounded out.
He was priceless.
5. AzureNW - July 15, 1999 - 6:20 PM PT
....Ô°°Ò....Ô°°Ò........Ô°°Ò
6. AzureNW - July 15, 1999 - 6:21 PM PT
(thinking about traffic...)
7. cmboyce - July 15, 1999 - 6:30 PM PT
Hey, Freysters!
What do you do when you see a space man?
You park, man!
8. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 6:31 PM PT
Hey...that was pretty good!
9. cmboyce - July 15, 1999 - 6:41 PM PT
My 7-year-old daughter tells that to people and really cracks 'em up. Another of her favorites is a knock=knock joke that can't work here, but I'll recite it and you can try it on your friends and loved ones in the privacy of your own home:
KK
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrup...
MOO!!
10. AdamSelene - July 15, 1999 - 6:42 PM PT
How do you make a car top?
11. AdamSelene - July 15, 1999 - 6:42 PM PT
Tep on the brake, tupid.
12. AdamSelene - July 15, 1999 - 6:43 PM PT
(that was from my wife. Honest)
13. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 6:48 PM PT
It goes without saying that in the Fray, a quorum will never be reached on what, or whom, is "funny".
But I bet there are alot of supposedly "funny people" most of us can agree are certainly NOT funny.
Anyone wanna throw out a name?
14. AdamSelene - July 15, 1999 - 6:50 PM PT
People who would rather put down others than tell jokes.
15. cmboyce - July 15, 1999 - 6:55 PM PT
What caused the Dark Ages?
Y1K
16. CalGal - July 15, 1999 - 7:17 PM PT
I have a question. Does anyone think about the difference between humor that is funny to *read* and humor that is funny to *hear*?
For example, this could be read aloud and be funny. But I think it is best appreciated if it is experienced by reading it.
(Dave Barry has the flu, and he is describing it)
"I spend a lot of time lying very still and thinking flu-related thoughts. One insight I have had is that all this time scientists have been telling us the truth: Air really *is* made up of tiny objects called "molecules". I know this because I can feel them banging against my body. There are billions and billions and billions of them, but if I concentrate, I can detect each one individually, striking my body, espeically my eyeballs, at speeds upwards of a hundred thousand miles per hour. If I try to escape by pulling the blanket over my face, they attack my hair, which has become almost as sensitive as my teeth.
There has been a mound of blankets on my wife's side of the bed for several days now, absolutely motionless except that it makes occasional efforts to spit into a tissue. I think it might be my wife, but the only way to tell for sure would be to prod it, which I wouldn't do even if I had the strength, because if it turned out that it was my wife, and she were alive, and I prodded her, it would kill her."
17. CalGal - July 15, 1999 - 7:32 PM PT
Now this next is one of the few "jokes" I will actually tell, because I think it's hysterical. And it's funny in written form, but it's better if you hear it. (I've posted it on the Fray before but it's been a long time).
Two nuns, Sister Marilyn and Sister Helen, are traveling through Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are travelling peacefully in the country.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, a diminutive vampire jumps onto the hood of the car and hisses through the windshield.
"Oh, no!" gasped Sister Marilyn, who is driving. "What shall we do?
"Turn the windshield wipers on," orders Sister Helen. "That will get rid of the abomination."
Sister Marilyn quickly switches on the windshield wipers. The vampire is knocked this way and that but hangs on, to the nuns' panic.
"What shall I do now?" cries Sister Marilyn.
Sister Helen is prepared. "Switch on the windshield washer! I remembered to fill it up with Holy Water in the Vatican."
Sister Marilyn turns on the windshield washer. The vampire screams as the water burns and blisters his skin, but he clings on grimly, hissing ferociously.
"Oh, no! What now?" Sister Marilyn is becoming frantic.
"Show him your cross!" screams Sister Helen.
Sister Marilyn slams on the brakes, opens her car door, and shouts:
"GET OFF MY FUCKING HOOD!!!"
18. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 7:38 PM PT
Selene - Message #14:
Quite right. My apologies.
19. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 7:40 PM PT
CalGal:
Good one!
20. CalGal - July 15, 1999 - 7:50 PM PT
Cont'd.
The second joke I had to modify in order to make it funny to read. Much of the humor is acted out if you tell it. (This joke does not work well on the phone, btw.)
The reason I wonder about this is because I've noticed that some people read by converting the words into voices--so reading and hearing are very similar processes. Other people make a huge separation between the two. Still others (myself) seem to mix and match.
But most of my humor is very aural in nature. One thing I notice that I do quite often (as did CMBoyce above) is simulate a "beat" for humor.
Punchline.
In other words, I use visual space to simulate something I would normally do verbally. Other people will just put the funny part right there next to the lead up, and I'm always taken aback--to me, it'd be like missing the beat, which would ruin a laugh if it were spoken.
I find I automatically convert from one style of reading (translating to voices) to the other (reading as words) depending on what is needed. Does everyone do this? Or is that one reason why some humor doesn't translate well in written form?
21. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 7:51 PM PT
I find real life alot funnier than any contrived comedy.
Recently, while searching around for relevant "filler" for a training I do on mediation, I came across this "Stupid Criminal" story in a professional journal.
A guy gets one of those new-fangled speeding tickets in the mail - a photo of the back of his car, tag # clearly visible, taken by an automatic roadside camera which is tripped by a radar gun planted in the ground down the road a bit. Included is his bill for $75 for going 10 miles over the limit.
So, the guy sends in a photo of $75.
In return, he receives a photo of a pair of handcuffs.
Needless to say, the ticket was then promptly paid.
22. arkymalarky - July 15, 1999 - 7:52 PM PT
Interesting. I thought Adam was referring to "comedians" like Don Rickles, but Joe apologized. I would think anyone trying to make a living at being funny is fair game for criticism when they're not.
Good joke, Cal. And when Dave Barry is on, he can get me laughing more than just about anybody I can think of.
23. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 7:58 PM PT
From the same journal:
Waiting for a bank to empty of customers, a guy goes in and writes out a holdup note on the back of a deposit slip. As he walks up to the teller window, several people walk in, and he chickens out.
He takes his note to a bank down the road, and tries again.
This time, the teller informs him that she cannot accept the note, as it is written on a different bank's form, and he will have to present it at the bank it came from.
The guy buys it, and goes back to the original bank, where the police arrest him.
24. arkymalarky - July 15, 1999 - 7:59 PM PT
I got really cracked up at a stupid criminal segment on tv once. There were several scenes from surveillance cameras, but the one that got me (it occurred in AR--no surprise) was the video of the guy burglarizing a department store after hours with a huge paper bag (department store type) over his head--smart fella to realize there were security cameras. Well, the eye holes in the bag were too small and he was bumping into shelves and finally fell down. He left, and reappeared with much bigger eye holes in the bag, and went back to his business of burglarizing the store. Unfortunately he was wearing the pants of his mall security uniform, so he was easily identified and arrested.
25. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 8:01 PM PT
Arky:
Well, whether Adam was or not, it (my suggestion) was a bad one - at least at this point.
(And, btw, I LOVE Don rickles...
see what I mean???!!!)
26. wabbit - July 15, 1999 - 8:18 PM PT
joezan, your two stories remind me of News of the Weird.
27. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 8:20 PM PT
Someone (Azure, maybe?) posted a link to a weird news site a long time ago, and I saw there one of the funniest real life news stories I've ever seen (although it wasn't very funny to the poor guy, I'm sure):
Anyway...
While working on his bike on the patio, this guy revs it, and it takes off (it had somehow gotten into gear) and, as he grabs it, it drags him right through the glass slider into the livingroom of his house.
The guy is all cut up, so his wife calls the ambulance. They come and take him to the hospital, where he receives a bunch of stitches and is released home.
First thing he does once he's home is relax on the toilet with a cigarette, which he tosses in the bowl when he's finished.
The toilet bursts into flames, burning him all around "there".
It seems his bike had spilled gas all over the floor, and while he was at the hospital his wife had soaked it up with paper towels, which she threw in the toilet.
28. arkymalarky - July 15, 1999 - 8:22 PM PT
Joe,
I can think he's funny at times, but he gets sorta old. Did you read the Beavis & Butthead discussion in the Play Pen? That's a big part of what's interesting about comedy--why what some folks find hilarious leaves others cold.
I sometimes tell my kids the joke about the man searching for spiritual truth. He travels the world and speaks to all types of "experts" from many different countries, when finally one of them tells him to go see a guru who lives high on a mountain in the Himalayas. The guy travels to Tibet, hires a Sherpa, struggles for days in terrible conditions until he finally arrives at this guru's cave. He finds the guru in a meditative pose within and meekly approaches him, saying "I was told you could give me the Truth." The guru looks up very calmly and slowly and says, "Life is a bowl of cherries." The guy is completely stunned, then he becomes angry. He starts raging at the guru, saying "I traveled the world, walked for miles, climbed snow-covered mountains, and all you can tell me is that life is a bowl of cherries?!!"
The guru looks at him with inquisitive confusion and replies, "Life is not a bowl of cherries?"
Usually they groan, but occasionally a student will really crack up. I find their varying reactions interesting.
29. cllrdr - July 15, 1999 - 8:22 PM PT
An elderly couple shows up in Divorce Court.
Judge: How old are you sir?
Husband: 92
Judge: And the Mrs.?
Wife: 89
Judge: How long have you been married?
Husband: Over 60 years.
Judge: Over 60 years you've been married and suddenly you want a divorce?
Wife: Well we would have done it sooner, but we wanted to wait until the children were dead.
30. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 8:22 PM PT
wabbit:
X Post!
(back to the story...)
As if that wasn't enough, the house he lives in is at the top of a steep hill, with stone steps winding down to the street. As the paramedics are taking him down the steps, they ask how the hell he got burned up like he did (it was the same guys who had taken him to the hospital earlier).
When the wife tells them what happened, they start laughing, and drop him. He goes sliding and tumbling the rest of the way down, and suffers a few broken bones to top his day off.
31. joezan - July 15, 1999 - 8:32 PM PT
Arky:
Good one! It sounds like something I *musta* heard before, but it's not.
Is there another guru-on-a-mountain joke?
32. JJBiener - July 15, 1999 - 8:33 PM PT
Cllrdr - I heard that joke but with this punchline:
Judge: Over 60 years you've been married and suddenly you want a divorce?
Wife: Enough is enough.
33. arkymalarky - July 15, 1999 - 8:43 PM PT
Joe, if there isn't, I'll bet somebody funny could think up some good ones. It's a pretty good joke setting, kind of like the farmer's daughter.
34. cmboyce - July 15, 1999 - 11:03 PM PT
Message #16
CalGal, I thought the Barry passage would be _much_ funnier read aloud, so the speaker could mug his distress and hold some syllables longer, for effect, and generally act the thing out. Generally, I think "comedy", as distinct from "humor", works better aloud, while the latter (defined as remarks about the oddity of things, rather than set-ups and surprises) is better on the page.
I know just what you mean, in Message #20, when you say, "people will just put the funny part right there next to the lead up, and I'm always taken aback--to me, it'd be like missing the beat, which would ruin a laugh if it were spoken." People who don't _feel_ that beat can really screw up a good joke, by not giving you time to absorb the set up and wonder "what the fuck...". OTOH, some jokes need to be gotten rid of quick, eg: Didja hear about the dyslexic cop. He was giving out IUDs.
(But there is a single beat in there, true.)
Message #21
"I find real life alot funnier than any contrived comedy."
I agree. Real life is just astonishing, and I love encountering that kind of stuff. A good one, well told, too. And Wabbit, great site at Message #26! Laughed my ass off, here and there, and was bemused at the least everywhere. It's bookmarked.
Message #33
Yeah, it's a very good setting. The "New Yorker" has a guru-on-a-mountain-top cartoon at least once a year, it seems. Of course, I can't remember any, at the moment! :O\
However, speaking of robbers, I saw a great comic strip, unfamiliar to me, taped up by the cash register in a drugstore not long ago. A thief points a gun at a clerk behind a counter and says, "Gimme your money!". The clerk replies, "No!", and the crook ripostes, "Well then, I'm gonna kill ya!". And the clerk says, "Alright! Alright! I'll give you the money!" (Increasingly vivid face
35. cmboyce - July 15, 1999 - 11:04 PM PT
(Increasingly vivid faces and typefaces make it clear that their voices are rising with each exchange.) So the crook shouts, "Well alright then, I won't kill ya!", to which the clerk snaps, as though he's just had enough, "Well then I aint gonna give you the money!" And the crook replies, "Well then, Goddamit! I'm outa here!" And the clerk says, "Alright then, get the fuck outa here!" And they part, each mumbling curses at humanity's wretched intransigence.
36. EricCartman1 - July 15, 1999 - 11:35 PM PT
Here's an old one:
What do you call a midget psychic on the run from the law?
A small medium at large.
37. joezan - July 16, 1999 - 4:13 AM PT
...here's another real life, stupid criminal story:
A few months ago one of my probationers, along with his stepfather, broke into the garage at a nearby golf course and stole two of the groundskeepers' four-wheelers, along with some chain saws and other tools, which they carried in the little trailer carts hooked to the backs of the vehicles. Something like $15,000 worth of stuff.
...and drove them home a mile away...
...through the snow.
38. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 5:27 AM PT
This tidbit from Salon:
"But as any 5-year-old can tell you, bodily functions are funny. They surprise you at inconvenient times. They can embarrass you. The fact that we're all subject to them is a great leveller -- which is one reason, maybe, that moviegoers who fancy themselves enlightened don't want to take the bait: They want every joke hung on an intelligent reference, something that will reaffirm their slightly more elevated place in the cosmos."
There may be some truth in that. I remember seeing one of Woody Allen's lamentable later films-- maybe Shadows and Fog, maybe Crimes and Misdemeanors. At any rate, I remember a certain amount of forced laughter from the audience at some of Woody's unfunny, overused, retread intellectual allusions (how many times can an director make a reference to Leopold and Loeb or Shoah? Quite a few times, as it turns out).
Anyway, the forced laughter seemed to be a kind of signal to other audience members that they got the joke, that they too had attended college.
39. PincherMartin - July 16, 1999 - 6:06 AM PT
Ace --
But sometimes elevated wit can be quite funny, and since it is so rare, it usually is more refreshing than the ten thousandth fart joke everyone has already heard. Some of my favorites are from Winston Churchill, who once, after having yet another discussion with Eisenhower's secretary of state, John Foster Dulles, on the dangers of communism coined the progression: "Dull, Duller, Dulles"
He once told General Montgomery that he should study logistics. Montgomery replied that he doubted he should become involved in such technical matters, saying "After all, you know, they say that familiarity breeds contempt." To which Churchill replied, "I would like to remind you that without a degree of familiarity we could not breed anything."
And finally, once in the House's men's room, he met Clement Attlee (the labor leader), who had arrived first and taken up a position at one end of the urinal trough. Churchill strode into the room, glanced at Attlee, and went to stand at the other end of the trough, as far from Attlee as he could. Attlee said: "Feeling standoffish today, are we, Winston?" Churchill replied: " That's right. Everytime you see something big, you want to nationalize it."
To me, these stories are precious, and much funnier than the typical fare because 1) they are true and 2) they require some background to understand. Once I began to tell an uncle of mine the Attlee story, and found myself explaining that the labor party (as opposed to Churchill's conservative party) would have been thought of as the party more sympathetic to the nationalization of large enterprises. That kind of explanation takes the force out of the joke.
40. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 6:12 AM PT
Pincher:
I've nothing against more elevated wit. So long as it's actually funny or witty, and not merely dressed in the trappings of intelligence.
Some commedianne (maybe Paula Poundstone) once remarked, nastily, that Dennis Miller's fans are the kinds of people who want to believe they're smart, so they laugh whenever he makes some obscure pop-culture reference, pround to signal that they got the "Arnold Ziff" reference.
Now, that might be too hard on Dennis, but I must admit I'm occasionally annoyed at his "referencing." A reference is automatically funny, Dennis. Dictionaries contain thousands of referenences and very little comedy. (He can be quite funny, though.)
41. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 6:16 AM PT
A reference *isn't* automatically funny, I meant.
And re: Churchill, he is a true wit.
But, let's face it: the last joke you explained is just a big dick joke. Funny, but hardly elevated.
Here's a good "big dick" joke from Drew Carey:
"Movie theaters are now selling popcorn in four sizes: Large, Extra Large, Super Large, and My Dick."
42. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 6:24 AM PT
A Dennis Miller "reference" I find funny:
I view the re-unification of the two Germanys with the same enthusiasm I greet the prospect of a Jerry Lewis/Dean Martin reunion... I wasn't thrilled with their previous work, and I'm not sure I'm too eager to see the new shit, either.
43. PincherMartin - July 16, 1999 - 6:28 AM PT
Ace -- Both the Drew Carey "My Dick" joke and the Dennis Miller joke on Germany are hilarious.
44. MsIvoryTower - July 16, 1999 - 6:37 AM PT
"But as any 5-year-old can tell you, bodily functions are funny. They surprise you at inconvenient times. They can embarrass you."
So embarrassment is the foundation of humor?
Sorry, I disagree with your conclusions. Yes, 5-year olds laugh at bodily functions gone amok, but by 25, if you haven't gotten tired of most of this then there's something wrong with your development, IMO. It's the *rare* body joke that can tickle my humor anymore, why? because I've seen most of it, experienced most of it, and it's not surprising anymore.
And watching bodily functions gone amok can be downright painful at times. Watching an old person with incontinence, or falling, or tottering along, is not funny in the least, it's damn frightening because that's where we'll all be (unless we die early) someday.
"The fact that we're all subject to them is a great leveller -- which is one reason, maybe, that moviegoers who fancy themselves enlightened don't want to take the bait:"
Or it could simply be that they find it boring, and no longer surprisingly funny. Amusing, yes, because it can still happen, but it's a "been there, done that" sort of thing. And many people find word play, unusual connections between events for allegories as more surprising and challenging humor than bodily function humor by the time they've grown up.
This isn't to say that someone who still likes to laugh at others who are in embarrassing situations, or who are being humiliated aren't grown up, but they certainly aren't *more honest or genuine*, or more in touch with *real* humor, than those who don't.
45. MsIvoryTower - July 16, 1999 - 6:38 AM PT
isn't not aren't
46. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 6:39 AM PT
Or it could be that you have an emotional investment in feeling mature and superior that you dismiss the possibility that Something About Mary or Dumb and Dumber or KingPin could actually be funny.
47. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 6:41 AM PT
Not that you do.
I just found the Salon piece interesting. "Interesting," meaning, "the guy pretty much agrees with my own pet theories."
48. jonesatlaw - July 16, 1999 - 7:57 AM PT
Stupid criminals department-
A old batchelor farmer who also served as the village drunk called a friend of mine awhile back for representation on a DWI charge.
At closing time, our hero leaves a small tavern on a hot summer night and heads towards the farmstead. He's driving an old Pontiac roughly the size of the USS Nimitz. Realizing that he'd not rolled the passenger window down, he leans across the seat to reach the window handle. He continues to drive through this manuever, forgetting the "T" intersection rapidly approaching. He strikes an embankment at the intersection and is flung into the windshield with his ass leading the way. Fortunately, he is not seriously hurt, although his ass is full of small cuts and a few pieces of windshield. He pulls himself out of the car and stands by the side of the road. He drops his pants in order to get some of the glass out of them and to inspect the damage. Preoccupied with attending to his nether regions, he fails to notice a pickup approaching until it is almost upon him. He is standing at the side of the road with his pants down and his briefs bloody. The driver stops and asks if he can help. Our hero asks the samaritan to call the police. They arrive and ask if there was anyone else involved in the crash. Our hero says no there wasn't and gives the names of several witnesses who can prove that he was at the tavern all night and left alone. They take him to county hospital for repairs and a blood test.
He tells my friend this story, and says he needs a lawyer. My friend replies that he needs Mother Theresa, because the only way out of this is a miracle.
49. arkymalarky - July 16, 1999 - 8:24 AM PT
Good story, Jones. It reminds me of two other drunk stories. One happened very close to home and made national news. In brief, a man was mowing his lawn with a riding mower and got a dui when he accidently ran into a car that was going by his yard.
The other is a little longer and happened to me and a commuting friend on the way home from school one afternoon. There's a shack I pass by every day on the way to work. This past spring I counted seven kids getting on the bus from that shack, not one over nine. Before that, though, two drunk brothers lived there.
Well, my friend and I were riding home one day (she was driving) and saw a man lying in a ditch right up from this shack. We were stunned and looking for a place to turn around while discussing what to do when we passed the house and saw another man lying on the porch with his back to the highway. We were both thinking that these guys must have been attacked and murdered and were really in a panic when we pulled back up to the house and got close enough to see that the man on the porch had no pants on. Thankfully, as I said, his back was to us. We headed to the nearest house to call for help, only to find out that they had gotten rip-roaring drunk in the middle of the day and had both simply passed out. Next day, they were their normal, listless, unbathed selves when we drove by.
50. Mazaska - July 16, 1999 - 8:31 AM PT
A Christian couple wanted to get a family pet. They felt it important to own a Christian trained pet. So, they went pet searching at a kennel specializing in Christian trained pets, they found a dog they liked quite a lot. When they asked the dog to fetch the Bible, he did in a flash. When they instructed him to look up Psalm 23, he complied equally fast, using his paws with dexterity. They were impressed, purchased the animal, and went home. That night they had friends over. They were so proud of their new dog and his major skills that they called the dog over had him show his Bible fetching ability. The friends were very impressed and asked whether the dog was able to do any of the usual dog tricks, as well. This stopped the couple cold, as they hadn't thought about "normal" tricks. Well, they said, "lets try this out." One more they called the dog, and they clearly pronounced the command, "Heel! "Quick as a wink, the dog jumped up, put his paw on the man's forehead, closed his eyes in concentration, and bowed his head.
51. marjoribanks - July 16, 1999 - 8:48 AM PT
Somewhere, someone has a link to the famous "best of Godlessclif" page that trouserpilot created. I hope it can be reproduced here, as far as I'm concerned that departed Fray Saint was consistently the funniest Fraygrant of all and that page contains some gems.
52. MsIvoryTower - July 16, 1999 - 8:59 AM PT
"Or it could be that you have an emotional investment in feeling mature and superior that you dismiss the possibility that Something About Mary or Dumb and Dumber or KingPin could actually be funny."
Or it could be that you have an emotional investment in trying to rationalize your tastes as mature and superior to those who find it unfunny.
Or maybe you don't.
"I just found the Salon piece interesting. "Interesting," meaning, "the guy pretty much agrees with my own pet theories.""
Or maybe you do.
53. PincherMartin - July 16, 1999 - 9:02 AM PT
Mr Banks is right about Godlesscliff -- he was hands-down the funniest fraygrant in this forum, im my opinion.
54. Mazaska - July 16, 1999 - 9:04 AM PT
In that case, sorry I missed him
55. PincherMartin - July 16, 1999 - 9:09 AM PT
Mazaska --
Well, If you are a Christian, I'm not sure you would have found him very funny, as Christians (and right-wingers) were the primary targets of his hilarious rants. Being a conservative, it took me some time to appreciate his wit.
56. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 9:10 AM PT
MsIT:
Meee-YOW!
Take it up with the dude from Salon. He wrote the article.
Incidentally, I don't find poop jokes for the sake of poop jokes funny. But neither do I say that a poop joke can't be funny. Which is something the dude from Salon gets into-- that some people assume that all poop jokes are equal.
57. MsIvoryTower - July 16, 1999 - 9:14 AM PT
Spade
You agreed with the article, so I don't need to take it up with the Salon author. Probably some guy stuck in the "glory of high school" anyway. I am very unimpressed with the "youngish" writers over in Salon. They think they're cultural hipsters, which automatically discounts them as hip anything in my book.
And a morning Mee-Oowww to you too.
58. marjoribanks - July 16, 1999 - 9:19 AM PT
I found Dumb and Dumber very funny, except for the ridiculous diarrhea jokes which made me look away. I also found Something about Mary funny except for the completely gross and over-the-top visual of the dudes balls caught in his zipper, which I wish I hadn't seen. I've heard that the Austin Powers movie is gross, and while I still want to see it I have to admit that aspect of humour I can mostly do without. It's better off-screen as far as I'm concerned.
59. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 9:24 AM PT
"I found Dumb and Dumber very funny, except for the ridiculous diarrhea jokes which made me look away."
I thought the toilet joke was pretty stupid and beneath the movie.
"I also found Something about Mary funny except for the completely gross and over-the-top visual of the dudes balls caught in his zipper, which I wish I hadn't seen."
Must disagree. That was funny and so incredibly outrageous that it's indelible. You thought to yourself, "How far will they take this?" Well, pretty damn far as it turned out.
Yes, a horrible, horrible image. But man, did that get audience response. I don't think I've ever heard a theater so loud as when they showed the zipper shot. The horrified groans from women and especially men.
"I've heard that the Austin Powers movie is gross, and while I still want to see it I have to admit that aspect of humour I can mostly do without. It's better off-screen as far as I'm concerned."
The crap joke in Austin is *awful*, disgusting, unforgiveably juvenile, witless, cheap, and NOT FUNNY. A serious misstep, IMHO. If you're going to do something outrageous, you better make sure it's funny enough to justify itself.
60. cllrdr - July 16, 1999 - 9:29 AM PT
Gross-out humor requires taste as much as any other kind."There's Something About Mary" was quite wonderful. And part of the reason for that was Cameron Diaz. Both she, and her character, are such good sports about the whole thing that none of the gags seemed mean or petty -- just wildly silly. "The Spy Who Shagged Me" on the other hand doesn't handle "Fat Bastard" very well. And part of that is because there's more set-up than character to his role. The more we know about a character the funnier the jokes will be.
That's one of the (many) reasons why Preston Sturges was such a genius. He gave some of the best lines in his movies to minor characters. But he fleshed them out so quickly, and so precisely that their every second on screen counts. I'm thinking especially of the Weenie King in "The Palm Beach Story."
61. marjoribanks - July 16, 1999 - 9:30 AM PT
" But man, did that get audience response. I don't think I've ever heard a theater so loud as when they showed the zipper shot. The horrified groans from women and especially men."
Yes, audience response, but did they find it funny? I didn't, I'm still traumatized and zip myself up extremely carefully now. The scene was funny enough without us having to see that "in the flesh".
62. MsIvoryTower - July 16, 1999 - 9:32 AM PT
Didn't see Dumb and Dumber, but the zipper scene in Something about Mary was humorous, not funny per se, but humorous, as if one can imagine how the young man felt. A sort of comic nightmare.
Generally poop scenes and jokes do not work for me. The most disgusting thing about Trainspotting (generally a disgusting movie anyway) was the morning scene with the soiled sheets. It wasn't funny, it wasn't humorous, it was just disgusting, IMO.
The funniest slapstick scenes in Something about Mary were the ones with the dog. Those were simply hysterical to me, given my general lack of sympatico with animal lovers generally.
63. bubbaette - July 16, 1999 - 9:33 AM PT
the funniest scene in somthin about mary was her hair mousse.
64. CalGal - July 16, 1999 - 10:05 AM PT
The Something About Mary joke has just become funnier now, since marjoribanks says it's not funny, scared him, and has caused him to "zip up more carefully". Now *that's* funny.
I wholeheartedly agree about the difference between SAM and Spy Who Shagged. If you're going to go for gross out humor, best be *really* sure it's funny.
65. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 10:14 AM PT
Majori:
Yes, I found it funny.
Funny in an odd way, though. Sort of just stunned, actually, and disbelieving that they'd gone *that* far. But funny too.
This sort of pushing the envelope type of gross-out is a gamble: Some people will respond like Cal and I, and admire the bravado, and others will question the filmmakers' taste and judgement. But the Zipper scene in SAM seems to be a gamble that paid off among most viewers, where the shit-drinking scene in Austin Powers seems to be a big dud.
I really can't imagine that scene in SAM ending *without* the zipper shot. I wasn't expecting it at the time, but now I think it's absolutely indispensible.
66. CalGal - July 16, 1999 - 10:19 AM PT
What made the zipper shot work, for me, was the utter sympathy of everyone else in the scene. The stepdad was horrified and sympathetic, the firemen felt bad, everyone did. Had they been laughing and giggling, I probably wouldn't have laughed so much. But they were reacting pretty much as people would in real life to that situation.
In fact, that's what made the entire movie work so well--it had quite a bit of heart.
67. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 10:24 AM PT
Cal:
Yes, that's important. We were really rooting for Ben Stiller. And the filmmakers obviously had a great deal of sympathy for him (even if they did put him through that horrid episode).
Had this happened to the "rival" or "enemy" in a film, I would have thought it was just gratuitous and awful. But this was the hero; we were meant to identify with him. What could have been the best night of his life turning into "We've got a bleeder!"...
So the humor wasn't mean-spirited in that sense; it was meant to make us empathize. And I did, personally.
Not that that's ever happened to me. Knock wood.
68. Slackjaw - July 16, 1999 - 10:26 AM PT
for my money, the funniest thing I ever read in the Fray was in that story wabbit wrote about PseudoErasmus--the part where the band of Greek fishermen traded him for a halibut. Breaks me up every time I think of it. I have this image of the interaction--the fishermen get the offer, glance at one another, scurry into a huddle to see if the offer is really serious, all the while looking back at the offerer to see if he hasn't figured out how much he is giving up, then rush back to the offerer so he doesn't have a chance to change his mind. They try to contain their glee so the other party won't get wise, and after the trade is consummated they turn around and try to quiety rejoice. Strangely, it doesn't seem as funny with some other type of fish besides halibut.
Probably it's not funny at all to anybody else. Weird.
An honorable mention for funniest thing in the fray is marjoribanks's revelation that he is so disturbed as to be extremely careful to zip his pants since watching There's Something About Mary.
69. CalGal - July 16, 1999 - 10:28 AM PT
CM:
"I thought the Barry passage would be _much_ funnier read aloud, so the speaker could mug his distress and hold some syllables longer, for effect, and generally act the thing out. Generally, I think "comedy", as distinct from "humor", works better aloud, while the latter (defined as remarks about the oddity of things, rather than set-ups and surprises) is better on the page."
Yes, but the way *you* read it aloud might differ from the way *I* read it aloud. Whereas truly aural humor is best said aloud.
It's possible, though, that you convert everything you read into internalized "hearing". (I'm sure there is an official term for this somewhere). Or at least more of it than I do. I automatically switch between the two.
And yes, I would put a pause before the punchline of that joke. But a short one.
70. CalGal - July 16, 1999 - 10:30 AM PT
"An honorable mention for funniest thing in the fray is marjoribanks's revelation that he is so disturbed as to be extremely careful to zip his pants since watching There's Something About Mary."
I'm laughing my ass off still. Told a guy here at work about it and *he's* laughing.
71. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 10:30 AM PT
Question:
Which hero suffers the most abuse in a film?
Nick Cage in Red Rock West (really, he didn't suffer that much compared to the next two, but that film was semi-realistic); or
Ben Stiller in Something About Mary; or
Ash (Bruce Campbell) in Evil Dead 2?
72. FreetoChoose - July 16, 1999 - 10:30 AM PT
Slackjaw
I agree, that was a funny story, And I enjoy it much more with your visual imagery.
73. Slackjaw - July 16, 1999 - 10:34 AM PT
Cage. That is semi-realistic "my life as I know it is over" suffering. Ben Stiller's character probably felt he was experiencing "my life as I know it is over" suffering in the bathroom scene, but you sort of shake that one off after a few years.
Unless he's like marjoribanks, traumatized to this day at the sight of a pair of pants. Then the award goes to Stiller.
74. marjoribanks - July 16, 1999 - 10:34 AM PT
"An honorable mention for funniest thing in the fray is marjoribanks's revelation that he is so disturbed as to be extremely careful to zip his pants since watching There's Something About Mary."
Exactly. It's funnier than the horrible image itself isn't it? Which is my point to Spades. The scene could have been just as funny without thrusting that shot into our faces.
75. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 10:37 AM PT
Slack:
1) Stiller never *did* get over it (he's in therapy, still talking about it);
2) he's also arrested for serial murder and beaten by cops;
and
3) he also suffers additional indignities/beatings which I can't recall right now.
Personally, though, I'd give the nod to Ash in Evil Dead 2. I guess you haven't seen that one, though.
Serious abuse. Let me tell you.
76. CalGal - July 16, 1999 - 10:37 AM PT
No. The scene was beautifully funny. Your reaction to it is actually an entirely different dessert.
77. Slackjaw - July 16, 1999 - 10:37 AM PT
strangely, the story of marjori's trauma is also funny because I now have a somewhat elaborate image to go with it. He's at a urinal, for example, and waits for everyone else to leave the men's room so he can take extra special care to zip up.
Or maybe I have concocted the image because it's funny, and I wanted to enjoy it more so I embellished it.
78. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 10:38 AM PT
...oh yeah: Stiller is also bitten in the groin by a manic poodle.
79. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 10:38 AM PT
...and beaten by a hulking retarded man...
80. marjoribanks - July 16, 1999 - 10:40 AM PT
Slackjaw, you're wierd.
81. Slackjaw - July 16, 1999 - 10:41 AM PT
FTC: oh, good--thought maybe all that detail was just plain weird.
Ace: No, haven't seen this movie with Ash. Maybe I still vote for Cage over Stiller because I believe on some level, some day, Stiller's character just chalks it all up to bad luck and laughs about it.
82. CalGal - July 16, 1999 - 10:44 AM PT
Stiller gets Mary. And the trauma he's seeing the shrink over isn't the zipper incident, but the opportunity he lost because of it.
83. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 10:45 AM PT
Slack:
1) Cage banged Lara Flynn Boyle, which is a big mitigating factor in his abuse.
2) He also ends the movie with a sackfull of hundred dollar bills, only some of which he threw at Boyle (and why do these idiots always throw the money away!!! "It's blood money," they'll say, and chuck away a pound of hundred dollar bills. WHO CARES IF IT'S "BLOOD MONEY"?!!! AAAAARGH!!! I *HATE* WHEN THEY THROW THE MONEY AWAY!!!!)
84. Slackjaw - July 16, 1999 - 10:48 AM PT
but Stiller gets Mary. And Cage, despite a measure of good fortune, peers down into the abyss. Stiller doesn't do that, and doesn't seem to be acting as if he thinks he is. He's hapless; Cage is suffering.
85. marjoribanks - July 16, 1999 - 10:51 AM PT
My vote for the character who takes the most (hilarious) abuse is Inspector Clouseau's boss in the Pink Panther series. I can't see that actor's face without cracking up.
86. Slackjaw - July 16, 1999 - 10:52 AM PT
Message #80 right next to Message #81 is kinda funny
87. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 10:57 AM PT
Clouseau doesn't get the kind of mega-abuse we're discussing here. The worst abuse he gets is abuse he pays Kato to give him (when Kato and him fight).
88. marjoribanks - July 16, 1999 - 11:00 AM PT
Spades,
Perhaps you missed the point in #85: the guy who takes the funniest abuse is Clouseau's boss.
89. ACEofSPADES - July 16, 1999 - 11:06 AM PT
Oh. The boss.
Well, he does get his nose shot off. But I still don't think he's that abused.
The actor, by the way, is Herbert Lom, who also played the doctor in "The Dead Zone."
90. MsIvoryTower - July 16, 1999 - 11:06 AM PT
Marj
He does take some funny abuse from Clouseau, one can even understand his being driven mad by it all.
For my money, Sellers is still unbeatable for modern slapstick foolishness in movies. Can't think of much that touches his performances, perhaps Steve Martin comes closest in a few of his movies.
91. CalGal - July 16, 1999 - 11:12 AM PT
My favorite kind of physical humor is the kind you find in Cary Grant movies.
It's a lesser movie, but there is a scene in My Favorite Wife that just kills me. He's in an elevator, and as the door is closing, he sees a woman who looks very much like his supposedly long-dead wife. He keeps looking, tilting slightly as the door keeps closing, until finally he falls over.
Another good scene in a CG movie is by Ginger Rogers, in Monkey Business (a truly funny movie). She has just drunk a magic elixir that causes her to become very young, but doesn't know it. She's drinking water during a conversation between Cary Grant and Charles Coburn, when suddenly she lies down, takes the glass, balances it on her nose, and gets up again. Amazing stuff, and all done without any fanfare at all.
92. marjoribanks - July 16, 1999 - 11:13 AM PT
Well, I've liked lots of other characters who basically fail, or take a bunch of abuse. Lebowski in The Big Lebowski was an amiable fellow who took a lot of shit and emerged still staggering. That was a very funny movie, far superior to Something About Mary.
93. bubbaette - July 16, 1999 - 11:40 AM PT
will somebody explain to me what was funny about Andy Kauffman? i never thought he was funny -- not even in taxi.
94. davidtudor - July 16, 1999 - 11:43 AM PT
I've never thought that humor that centered on harm or even death to living beings was really that funny. And, as for poor Stiller's zipper problems, don't you really think the see-it-all really was just for hey-bet-you-didn't-think-we-would-show-'em-did-you-and-aren't-we-really-hip effect?
There are exceptions to my so-called rule, of course. Lom's misfortunes in the Panther movies are a good example.
However, to me nothing can compare to what happens to those poor white poodles in A Fish Called Wanda. The first time, shock that "they" would do something like that to a poor little animal. The second time, a bit more of the same but with the build-up in anticipation as to what in hell they were going to do. And, all along the ditsy owner just nonchalantly goes about her business trying to let her diminishing group of doggies do their business.
Perfect.
95. MsIvoryTower - July 16, 1999 - 11:44 AM PT
Bubbaette
Agreed. Same for Carol Kane (Cane?). On the other hand, Christopher Lloyd was very funny in Taxi to me, and he was funny in some of his other work, although he seems to have fallen out of humor these days.
Another unfunny woman to me is Rita Radner (?). And Elaine Boosier has ceased being funny at all.
96. CalGal - July 16, 1999 - 11:46 AM PT
Rudner, I think.
I never much cared for Carol Kane, but Kaufman was so surreal he was amazing. But my favorite Taxi episode was the one where he was Alex for the whole show.
97. MsIvoryTower - July 16, 1999 - 11:47 AM PT
On the other hand, Lucille Ball, in I Love Lucy, is still remarkably funny. She's intergenerationally funny. She's enduringly funny.
I'm amazed that my daughter is an avid fan of hers, never misses the show.
98. bubbaette - July 16, 1999 - 11:50 AM PT
she was good in i love lucy but her later shows stunk.
99. davidtudor - July 16, 1999 - 11:51 AM PT
Well, to me Christopher Lloyd was very funny in whichever of the Addams Family movies it was that had the kids going amuck at a camp and with the wonderful Joan Cusack playing Lloyd's character's money-grubbing, trying to kill him wife. (Um, you can probably tell that I don't really know too much about the Addams Family's characters names.)
100. MsIvoryTower - July 16, 1999 - 11:52 AM PT
Yes. Well, her first spin off was good, as I recall, but the later ones got progressively worse.